Yes, the language police really exist, and we’re a troop of trans people. We wear badges, we pack some heavy firepower, and we know what you’re saying.
The trans community has basically had to create a language of our own in order to define and describe ourselves — a language that can seem completely foreign to those who have little to no knowledge about, or experience with, gender diverse people.
The problem with community-specific terms is that every “community,” no matter what the criteria for entry, is not a monolith, and, therefore, its members do not always agree among themselves as to what certain words mean and what terms are appropriate or offensive. And if we can’t agree among ourselves, how can we expect non-trans people to get it right?
The fact is that we can’t — not always. We can’t hold non-trans people to the standards that we expect in our own community — at least not everyone and not all the time. What we can expect is respect for our language, an honest attempt to learn our terms and use them in a reasonably correct manner, and a genuine desire for a deeper understanding of who we are and why our language is important to us.
I will be the first to admit that there are days or moments when I feel as if I’m the chief of the trans-language police. I tell myself to lighten up, but sometimes it’s difficult. What I really need to do is to determine whether or not I’m dealing with malice or a mistake. And I need to determine where and from whom the perceived “slight” is coming.
Just like ignorance of the law is no excuse, true ignorance of trans and gender diverse people, with no desire to learn or understand, deserves my wrath — or, at the very least, my irritation. But a simple slip-up, or the use of a term that might offend me, but wouldn’t offend a dozen other trans people who heard it, deserves a break.
Language is important. Words can be offensive, painful, and damaging, or they can be friendly, helpful, and healing.
We’re going to be talking a lot about language, so if you’re new to all things gender diverse, stick around. And don’t sweat an honest mistake.
(That’s me as Annie Oakley, by the way. When I was younger, I believed in Old West justice.)
No comments on this one? Amazing!
I have major problems with the enforced “language” policing that is taking place on the internut regarding certain terms.
Transgender is a major one. Used as an umbrella term it is extremely offensive to almost every woman of history I have met because we did not “trans” our gender, the fact it could not be “trans” was the entire problem we faced. Plus, once corrected, the last thing most of us want is to be “othered” out of the womanhood we fought so hard to achieve in the first place.
The other really problematic policing is regarding “tranny” as insult. Some very vocal people are trying very hard to make this the equivalent of “nigger” and “faggot”…. the problem with that is both those other terms had their roots as intended and intentional dehumanizing terms from the get go. “Tranny”, on the other hand, had it’s roots from within communities of trans people as an internal “cute” and affectionate self reference and that was exactly how it was used when I first transitioned. Almost no one outside the trans communities other than a few gay men and lesbian women ever heard of it, let alone used it. Some of the seminal parts of trans history of the past 4 decades used “tranny” as part of it very name! Now that history is insulting? Tranny please! get over it.
I have read about the history of “tranny” as you present it here, and I think that’s interesting how it has changed from a term of affection to a term of offense.
Many young people are reclaiming it as a positive term, but “reclaiming” might not really reflect what is being done with regard to the word’s history, because that “reclaiming” doesn’t really reflect its origins in the group that you are referring to. So maybe they are not really “reclaiming” it so much as they are claiming it in a different way.
I appreciate the comment and the insight, because I am also aware of the offense surrounding the word transgender for women of history. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Matt, I am a woman of history, but that history remains mine as much as anyone’s. That always seems to be overlooked. I liked the term tranny. It’s friendly, affectionate and will always have that favour to me. The current justification of tranny as insult seems to revolve mostly around it’s eventual use by the porn industry first, which if you think about it required actual transpeople to exist and whatever else you might think about it, provided an alternative income source for many pre-op transwomen besides out and out prositution and still does to some extent.
I was an active trans activist myself back in the day and was instrumental in organizing State, Regional and National trans organizations….often the first leadership to boot. Back then I asked only one thing in return, the use of transgender AND transsexual. No transgender id’ed person ever agreed to that…and I was demonized for asking and literally driven out of trans activism.
I knew Sylvia Rivera, I spoke immediately after her at her last political rally against ESPA and the sellout of trans rights in New York State back then. One of the stories I never have told up to now is Sylvia planned to spend the rest of her life at our Spiritual home in the Catskills had she recovered from her last illness We took in a lot of street girls back then too so I actually know something about that culture, it’s terminology and motivations. Sylvia was something….but I loved her for it. Her partner did live eventually with us until her mental illness became too much for us to handle without professional help. If you look at the video of Sylvia’s funeral, I am the one next to the carriage holding Sylvia’s partner’s hand as the procession went on. Big red haired old lady with a cane.
The very first trans themed and authored comic was “Tranny Towers”, I have internet reprint rights for it from the author. The street girl home in Brooklyn that Sylvia Rivera lived at her last five years was “Transie House”….no one gets to tell me these are now insults, especially those who were long pre trans anythings at the time.